It is not that which we keep out, but that which we let in that changes us.
We do not come into this world close-minded.
We are open, aware, and receptive of everything going on around us.
We take everything in.
We want to know everything.
We want to ask every question, test every theory, and discover all that there is to be discovered.
We are curious, engaged, and fascinated by everything that is new, different, and foreign to our tiny little worlds.
It is all amazing and wondrous, but then, somewhere along the way, we start to develop opinions, beliefs, and, with these, fears.
We start to create walls around who we are and who we are not, what we like and what we do not, and what we hold true and what we do not.
This is a necessary stage in our development because boundaries are what give us identity.
With boundaries, however, come limitations.
As we get older and our personalities, tastes, and values develop, we begin to close ourselves off to that which does not align with the story we tell ourselves about who we are.
The stronger we hold onto this story and all of the ideas, beliefs, and opinions that form it, the more our curiosity fades.
As goes curiosity, so goes possibility.
Our lives become as small or as large as the story we tell ourselves about the world around us and our place within it.
If we want to live a life full of possibility, wonder, and experience, we must learn to hold onto the story of who we are more loosely.
We have to allow our boundaries to be come a little bit more porous, to let in that which is not us, so that we can become someone new.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
If energy can only be changed, not created or destroyed, we must decide what kind of change we are going to make with the energy we have.
We do not get to choose all of the input we receive in our lives. We do not get to decide the circumstances we are born into and we only have some modicum of say about the relationships we have and the joys and tragedies we experience along the way.
Whether we like it or not, all of this has an effect on us. It changes us. In turn, as we change, we perceive and interact with the world differently and, through us, the world is then changed as well.
Much of the time, this all happens without us really being conscious of it, without us even noticing it, and without us having much control over it. At some point, however, if we want to lead lives of purpose, we must stop to acknowledge our role in the cycle of change.
While all that happens to us may not always be within our control, once we recognize that our circumstances, our relationships, and our experiences affect us and the way we affect others, the onus is on us to decide exactly what kind of change we want to facilitate.
Every moment is an opportunity to take what we experience and to transform it into something else, into something positive or something negative, into something better or something worse, into either love or fear.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
Our flaws, our cracks, and our scars need not diminish our capacity for love, compassion, and creativity.
In spite of how we have been hurt, in spite of how we have been damaged, deceived, abused, or abandoned, we are all capable of boundless love, endless compassion, deep connection, unwavering dedication, and powerful, life-affirming, world-changing creativity.
Each and every one of us is a damaged vessel in some way. No one makes it out of this world unharmed, unhurt, and fully in tact. But, the vessel itself is not the essence of what it contains or is capable of containing.
When we look at each other, when we look at ourselves, we can choose to focus on the flaws, the cracks, and the sharp, jagged edges our experiences have given us. Or, we can choose to see beyond the vessel, to the potential it contains within it, the potential for fullness, for abundance, and for life.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
How can we know what we are missing if we limit our experiences to only that which is familiar?
We are only given one opportunity to experience this life. This means that we only have one opportunity to experience ourselves within it. If we limit our experiences to only that which is familiar to us, we will never know who we truly are.
There is nothing wrong with developing tastes and preferences as we move through this world, discovering and deciding what we like or dislike. If, however, these tastes and preferences are based on too narrow a field of information, on too limited a set of experiences, we may never know who we truly are and if our likes and dislikes are truly our own.
This does not mean that we should be so promiscuous and whimsical that we never commit to anything. In order to truly experience life, we must go deep into ourselves and our experiences, as much as we must go wide. On the other hand, if our boundaries are based on fear and prejudice, our life and ourselves within it will be small indeed.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu
Artwork by Ana, except where otherwise noted
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Meditations on God 