One side of integrity faces out into the world and the other faces us.
Outwardly, our integrity is represented by who we are, how we present ourselves to others, what we do, what we say, and how well our actions align with our words and intentions.
Inwardly, our integrity is a measure of what we allow into our lives, our hearts, and our minds, and how we allow the world and its people to affect us, influence us, and change us.
We often think only about the outward manifestation of integrity and forget about its internal aspects.
That is to say, we tend to think only about integrity in terms of what we do and say, but not what we accept, tolerate, and internalize.
In some ways, the external manifestation of our integrity is the easy part.
It is difficult to do perfectly, but it is relatively easy to measure.
Simply put, external integrity is being where we say we are going to be when we say we are going to be there and doing what we said we would do once we arrive.
Our internal integrity is much more complex of an issue because it is extremely personal.
A fulfilling, meaningful, and purpose-driven life demands openness.
In order to live, to really, truly live, we absolutely must be open to new ideas, new experiences, and sensitive to the needs, feelings, and desires of those around us.
But, this is where it gets tricky.
We must be open, compassionate, and sensitive enough to experience the world, our relationships, and our lives in their fullest, deepest, and richest capacities while also not forgetting, losing, and betraying who we are in the process.
Internal integrity is a razor sharp line where we must be just porous enough to feel everything, but with boundaries clear and strong enough to only allow in that which serves us and others through us.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
It is not that which we keep out, but that which we let in that changes us.
We do not come into this world close-minded.
We are open, aware, and receptive of everything going on around us.
We take everything in.
We want to know everything.
We want to ask every question, test every theory, and discover all that there is to be discovered.
We are curious, engaged, and fascinated by everything that is new, different, and foreign to our tiny little worlds.
It is all amazing and wondrous, but then, somewhere along the way, we start to develop opinions, beliefs, and, with these, fears.
We start to create walls around who we are and who we are not, what we like and what we do not, and what we hold true and what we do not.
This is a necessary stage in our development because boundaries are what give us identity.
With boundaries, however, come limitations.
As we get older and our personalities, tastes, and values develop, we begin to close ourselves off to that which does not align with the story we tell ourselves about who we are.
The stronger we hold onto this story and all of the ideas, beliefs, and opinions that form it, the more our curiosity fades.
As goes curiosity, so goes possibility.
Our lives become as small or as large as the story we tell ourselves about the world around us and our place within it.
If we want to live a life full of possibility, wonder, and experience, we must learn to hold onto the story of who we are more loosely.
We have to allow our boundaries to be come a little bit more porous, to let in that which is not us, so that we can become someone new.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
New ideas are often rejected, not just out of fear, but out of laziness.
The law of inertia applies not only to objects.
It applies to us as well.
When we are at rest, we tend to want to stay at rest.
When we are in motion, we tend to want to stay in motion.
Once an idea, belief, or behavior takes hold of us, as long as appears to be working in our favor, we do not like to change.
Change requires effort.
Change threatens inertia.
It require us to move if we are at rest and it requires us to pause or pivot if we are in motion.
For this reason, it is far easier to continue to do what we have always done and believe what we have always believed than it is to consider a new idea, attitude, or action.
In fact, the mere consideration of something other than what we currently believe or do requires effort.
It is far easier to dismiss that which is new or different outright than it is to entertain the possibility of having to change.
The dismissal of new ideas requires nothing from us.
It allows us to stay the same.
Curiosity, on the other hand, is demanding.
To be curious is to be engaged, involved, and open to the possibility that we are wrong.
To be curious is to embrace change and the opportunities it offers.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
Meditations on God 