Some fears are quite real, your body and mind’s way of telling you that something is wrong and that you are in imminent danger.
These fears arise to protect you and to keep you safe
As such, these experiences of fear should be respected and given attention.
Most of the time, however, the fear you experience has nothing to do with actual danger.
Most of your fears do not exist to protect you from harm, but to prevent you from taking risks.
These fears arise to challenge you.
These fears are your mind and body’s way of asking you if you are serious, if you really want to do something brave and become someone new, or if you want to back down and stay the same.
These are the fears that tell you that you are not good enough, that you do not deserve success, and that you are not worthy of your dreams and aspirations.
When things that once challenged us no longer do, we can either choose comfort in routine or growth in new challenges.
There is nothing wrong with comfort in itself.
We all crave it in some way.
After all, growth and progress are not sustainable without some time for rest, recovery, and reflection in our lives.
The problem arises when comfort becomes our standard and we begin avoiding that which makes us uncomfortable, that which is difficult, and that which challenges us to improve.
Comfortability causes us to close our minds to new ideas, experiences, and opportunities because what we are doing seems to be working, or at least it works at keeping us comfortable.
We soon forget the excitement and satisfaction that comes from facing and overcoming resistance, frustration, and failure.
We forget what it feels like to experience the extremes of our joy and our pain, and we settle for the mundanity of that which is merely good enough.
Long periods of comfort in our lives should be seen as a warning sign that we are not pushing ourselves hard enough, that we are not reaching far enough, and that we have ceased striving for growth, improvement, and experience.
There is no reason to put our health, safety, or relationships in jeopardy simply for a new challenge, but, at the same time, we must recognize that most experiences worth having are not easily had.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
As important as momentum is to progress, momentum in the wrong direction or in too many directions at once is counterproductive.
We need to break free from the things that are holding us back, whether these are fear, procrastination, distraction, or some other form of internal or external resistance, and get moving in the direction of our personal, occupational, relational, or creative goals.
That is to say, progress requires momentum.
The more momentum we have, the more progress we seem to make and, the more progress we make, the more momentum we seem to have.
This can result in the misguided tendency to conflate the two, but momentum and progress are not the one-in-the-same.
The fact is that momentum, alone, does not necessarily give us the kind of progress we want or need.
While momentum is a powerful tool for change, if not properly informed, focused, and balanced, the change it creates can be be chaotic or even destructive.
It is far better to make slower, steadier, and more careful steps in the right direction than it is to make great leaps in the wrong direction or in too many directions at once.
By focusing on small, incremental progress, we give ourselves room to pivot, to alter or reverse our position and direction if we realize we have made a mistake or that our goals or environment has changed.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
If we have goals we want to achieve and the means by which to achieve them, the greatest battle we face from day to day is the battle against distraction.
Quite often, what stands between us and our goals is clarity, time, and resources. That is, our goals are not clearly defined, measurable, and realistic, we have too many other commitments and, therefore, have no time to work toward what we want to achieve, and/or we do not have enough money or support to do the things we want to do.
When this is the case, it is easy to be a disappointed daydreamer, hoping and wishing things were different, telling ourselves that, if only our circumstances changed for the better, we would do great things. Or, maybe we use these undesirable conditions as fuel for our internal fire, as the thing that drives us to improve, to set goals, and to work toward them a little bit at a time until we are in a better position to achieve them.
Regardless of how we get there, once we are in the clear, however, once our circumstances change in our favor and we gain clarity, we find the time, and our financial or community resources fall into place, we face an entirely new challenge. Our previous excuses no longer bear weight and we must face ourselves and the possibility of success in whatever goal, dream, or aspiration we once claimed to have.
With nothing stopping us from the outside, now we have to make a decision. We can either follow our hearts toward that which we having been pining over or we can forget what once seemed to matter so much and take on a new set of of excuses and distractions that will keep us from going after what we desire.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
Demands, threats, and force may help us accomplish our immediate goals, but dictatorship is not leadership. True leadership requires that others follow us consciously, voluntarily, and willingly. This requires a shared perspective.
In order for others to follow us by choice, of their own informed free-will, they need perspective. They need to see and understand why they should trust us, why they should follow us, and why they should do so enthusiastically.
They need to see how and why our mission is in their best interest, how it relates to their life, their goals, and their purpose.
Before we can expect others to see things from this perspective, however, we must first see things from theirs. If we do not understand who they are and where they are coming from, we may be able to push them to where we are trying to go, but we can not expect to lead them there.
If we want others to care about what we want, they must first know that we care about them.
Once it is clear to those we wish to lead that we not only understand their perspective, but that we actually care about them, their lives, their needs, and their goals, it is much easier for them to care about us and what we want or need from them.
In this place of shared perspective, the leader-follower dynamic is transcended and the team begins to form.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Bodyand Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.
Meditations on God 