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Meditations on God

  • Robert Van Valkenburgh

  • Saying No To Distractions

    If we are going to follow our hearts and try to live our best life, we have to learn how to say no to things that do not serve this purpose. 

    This is not because we should be selfish or stingy with our time, but because if something is worth doing, it is worth our undivided attention. 

    We should not want to give ourselves half-heartedly to other people’s needs or our life’s purpose. 

    When it is clear that giving ourselves to one will mean sacrificing the quality and quantity of time and attention that we give to the other, we must decide which cause is more important. 

    Sometimes, we must put one on hold while we focus on the other. 

    But, if we know our path, if we are dedicated to it, and we are unwilling to give in to distraction, we must find a way to turn down people and opportunities that take us away from this path, and we must find a way to do this that is both generous and gracious. 

    It is simply impossible to live our best life without generosity and graciousness. 

    It is also impossible to live our best life without focus, purpose, or direction. 

    Not every road is meant to be gone down. 

    We will never get where we are headed if we take every detour. 

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    August 9, 2021
    direction, focus, goals, journey, path, purpose

  • What Others Think

    When we presume to know what others think about us, not only are we putting thoughts in their heads that may not actually be there, but we are also wasting an untold amount of time and energy on something we can do nothing about. 

    The truth is that most people spend most of their time thinking about themselves, not about us. 

    Even when they are thinking about us, what they think is really none of our business anyway. 

    We certainly cannot read their minds. 

    Nor are we very likely to change their minds. 

    What, then, is the point of obsessing about what goes on in someone else’s head? 

    We are far better off trying to live our best life than trying to live a life that pleases others. 

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    August 7, 2021
    attention, energy, time

  • A Cycle Of Healing

    No matter how we feel, we do not have the right to hurt others in order to make ourselves feel better. 

    We cannot improve our emotional, psychological, or spiritual state by destroying someone else’s. 

    Hurt does not fix hurt. 

    Doing someone else harm does not take away our pain. 

    It does not heal our injuries. 

    Nor can it reverse our trauma. 

    What we have experienced is ours to live with, to resolve within ourselves, and to use as fuel for whatever path we choose to take in our lives. 

    If we choose to use our pain to hurt others, all we have done is to create more pain in the world and our lives will have meant nothing. 

    If, on the other hand, we are able to transcend our pain, if we are able to transform it into compassion, empathy, and understanding, and we are able to use these to do good in the world, to help others, and to heal the other broken souls such as ourselves, then our lives will have purpose and meaning. 

    Just like suffering, healing is a cycle that can be passed on to others, but it takes consciousness, intention, and effort. 

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    August 6, 2021
    compassion, empathy, healing, love, meaning, pain, purpose, suffering, understanding

  • Love In Spite Of Life

    We cannot go through life without being hurt. 

    Pain, sorrow, and heartbreak are inevitable. 

    And, the more we open our hearts to love and joy, the more we risk disappointment and sadness. 

    This does not mean that we should avoid opening our hearts, however. 

    It does not mean that we should avoid being hurt. 

    Simply put, we cannot even if we want to. 

    Instead of trying to live without pain, our goal should be to find a way to live with love in spite of it. 

    If we can do this, it will not necessarily make our pain or our difficulties go away. 

    It will, however, make them mean something. 

    If we allow it, life’s tragedies, difficulties, and heartaches can overwhelm us. 

    But, if we resist giving in and giving up, if we fight back against the tide with love, nothing can stand in our way. 

    In the end, if we choose it, love wins. 

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    August 4, 2021
    difficulty, love, pain, purpose

  • Respecting Our Emotional Limitations

    Life is difficult enough on its own without our taking on other people’s emotional challenges as our own. 

    We need boundaries. 

    This is not easy, however, if we are naturally empathetic. 

    That is, if our own emotional natures tend to be porous, we will find ourselves easily influenced by feelings, both positive and negative, of the people around us. 

    As a result, our internal lives are made better or worse simply by association. 

    If this is the case, we may need to be extremely particular about the people with whom we associate and the degree to which we associate with them. 

    If not, we will have trouble distinguishing between our feelings and the feelings of others, especially if the people we are around have particularly intense emotional natures of their own. 

    Unless we are able to establish strict standards and boundaries for our relationships, we may lose ourselves in the emotional turmoil of our friends, families, and associates. 

    For this reason, if we are particularly sensitive, it is imperative that we do our best to limit our relationships to people whose emotional natures positively compliment our own or, at least, people who are respectful with regards to how they express their feelings in our presence. 

    We should be working to improve each others’ lives after all. 

    Mutual benefit and improvement should be the goal of all of our relationships whenever possible. 

    Obviously, this is not always possible, but we can at least strive for this ideal. 

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    August 3, 2021
    boundaries, emotions, empathy, feelings, limitations

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