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Meditations on God

  • Robert Van Valkenburgh

  • Irrational Inhumanity

    We think we know what scary things exist in this world, but for most of us, thankfully, this is simply theory.

    Often, we separate ourselves from the bad in the world and think of morality in terms of a rational choice made between right and wrong, wherein those who do wrong have simply made a poor choice. Most people who do wrong are people just like us who have gone astray, perhaps out of fear, selfishness, a perceived lack of choice, bad influence, or simply by mistake.

    They are otherwise good people who have made mistakes. In many, if not most cases this is true. Somewhere far beyond this rationalized sense of morality, however, exist anomalies, aberrations of humanity who are simply evil.

    There is no rationality behind who they are or what they do. They do wrong and they harm others because there is something sick or broken about their souls. These are the people, too far gone to be reasoned with or rehabilitated, for whom there is no return to decency.

    These people are not like us. Their very presence feels alien. There is something deeply disturbing, even disgusting about them, but they may hide this part of themselves so well that we cannot see it.

    There is no preparing for who they are or what they are capable of because it is so far removed from what it is to be human that it is unpredictable to our rational brains. It is animalistic and predatory. It is terrifyingly inhuman and inhumane.


    Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

    Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

    Artwork by Ana, except where otherwise noted

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    November 11, 2019
    evil, good, humanity, morality, rationality, right, wrong

  • Want Adapts to Need

    Be the person you need to be and the person you want to be will adapt.

    It would be nice if we could all just ‘be ourselves’ without consequences, if everybody liked, loved, and respected us no matter how we behaved. Unfortunately, the people who count on us, those we serve, need us to show up in ways that are often very different than who we think we are or want to be.

    When there is disparity between our self image and necessity, when these things do not not align, if we err on the side of service and necessity, our self image will adapt. Adaptation, after all, is the essence of evolution. If we are not evolving, if we are not growing and changing to meet and overcome the demands of our environment, we are stagnant and stagnation means death.

    The persons we imagine ourselves to be are, more often than not, only shadows of our true selves and our true potential. Our imagined selves can never grow beyond these shadows without light shone on them. The light we need in order to see and grow past the limitations of our imagined selves is friction and feedback from our relationships.

    In other words, we need conflict. We need to be challenged. Then, we need to rise to the challenge, but this requires us to change.


    Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

    Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

    Artwork by Ana, except where otherwise noted

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    November 10, 2019
    adaptation, change, evolution, growth, need, service, want

  • Become Your Meaning

    The good days may not outnumber the bad, but no one said that they would.

    Some of us struggle, with happiness always seeming just out of reach. The ever-driving search for meaning pushing us just beyond the place of contentment others seem to settle into effortlessly. Uneasy and anxious, we claw our way through the darkness, grasping for a ray of light and gasping for a comforting breath.

    All of this can feel overwhelming at times. It can feel, even on our best days, as if no matter how good things are, we will never feel on the inside the way others appear to feel on the outside. The good days are overshadowed by the not-so-good days and hope and happiness can feel like a fantasy we only once imagined ourselves to experience in a fleeting moment of delusion.

    It is not easy, but that is okay. Life is difficult, more difficult for some than for others. Life will not change to suit us, nor will others adapt to meet us at our level of need.

    We must become the light. We must be the breath. We must find our peace and our purpose and we must dedicate ourselves to that, to carry us through the bad days, beyond the struggle, into our meaning and a world that is better because of our willful, persistent, and dedicated participation, in spite of us and because of us.


    Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

    Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

    Artwork by Ana, except where otherwise noted

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    November 9, 2019
    difficulty, life, meaning, persistence, purpose, struggle

  • Presence, Joy, & Regret

    Be grateful for the moments of joy you experience with those you love, no matter how brief they may be, because someday they will be but a memory. 


    Neither time nor joy are promised to us. How much we experience of each in this life is largely a factor of providence. How well we experience each, however, is largely a matter of choice, the choice to be present. 


    If we are fortunate enough to enjoy time with people we love and who love us in return, how that time is experienced is as important, perhaps more important, than the actual quantity of it. Whereas quantity is largely out of our control, quality is not. For however many joyful moments we are blessed to experience with our loved ones, it is entirely our responsibility to be present for them, to cherish them, and to make the most of them.


    Presence is the absence of expectations, agendas, motives. It is the absence of distraction and disturbance, from within and without. It is openness to and acceptance of what is happening and being exactly who is needed in that moment for those who are there. 


    Presence is service to the moment and those within that moment. In the end, the moments and people we were present for will become our memories. The ones we were not will become our regrets.  

    Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

    Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

    If you found this post helpful or meaningful in some way, please feel free to Share, Comment, and Subscribe below.

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    November 9, 2019
    experience, joy, loved ones, presence, quality, regret, time

  • Giving In Means Missing Out

    Going along with that which is easy, may cause us to miss out on that which is right.

    Acquiescence is an act of negative ego and unhealthy self-denial. When we acquiesce, we give up and give in, often to some decision or some path that we do not agree with. Acquiescence means going with the flow, even if the flow is pushing us in a direction that is in opposition to our true interests or our heart’s true desires.

    There is no truth in acquiescence. Going along with things simply because it seems easier than resisting is a path of regret, remorse, and resentment. Denying ourselves in this way is anti-humility.

    When we go along with others reluctantly, so as to not cause disruption or disturbance, we are not present in the process. When we acquiesce to a path that is not our own, we are not truly there. Our mind and our heart is elsewhere and this division of self ultimately makes us ineffective and unhelpful.

    Resisting is not the solution any more than is false enthusiasm. Sometimes the right thing to do is to do nothing, to pause, be still, and wait for answers.

    If opportunities pass us by while we wait for our truth to reveal itself, we must understand that we are not missing out. On the contrary, it is when we go along with that with which we do not believe that will cause us to miss our opportunity to participate in that which is right for us when it manifests.


    Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

    Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

    If you found this post helpful or meaningful in some way, please feel free to Share, Comment, and Subscribe below.

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    November 7, 2019
    acquiescence, desire, ego, heart, humility, opportunity, self, truth

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