Meditations on God

From Annoyance to Hatred (There is Still Hope)
Our feelings about others are a reflection of our inner world more than they are an objective statement about the other person’s character.

If we allow our negative feelings about another person to sit with us unresolved for too long, they will grow and consume us. Like a splinter under the skin, what begins as a minor irritation, if left unaddressed, slowly becomes infected. If not removed and treated, that infection begins to spread until we become sick from it and, like an infection, negativity can kill us.

At first, we may simply be annoyed by another person’s demeanor or actions. If that person is just an acquaintance, this is easily dismissed and let go. If, however, this person is close to us and we do nothing in ourselves to resolve this feeling of annoyance, it will grow into resentment. If this resentment is allowed to build, even the thought of the subject or the mention of his or her name will begin to cause us irritation.

Once we are irritated by another person to this degree, our feelings begin to reveal themselves on our face and in our behavior. Like an infection, the resentment is taking over our body. As this worsens, as our sickness grows, our resentment turns to contempt. Contempt is difficult to overcome. It is a deep sickness whose only cure is a degree of honesty and extreme self appraisal that few people are truly capable of.

If allowed to spread deeper into our being, contempt will grow into disgust. Disgust is nearly incurable. It is so malignant an emotion that it will require a complete overhaul of our mentality and personality if we are to be saved from it.

Beyond disgust lies only hatred and destruction, both self destruction and the desire to destroy others. Hatred is one step away from death, but even in hatred, so long as there is blood in our veins and breath in our lungs, there is hope. Through empathy, understanding, and compassion, we can be born anew.

Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

-Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body, Severna Park’s Holistic Chamber of Commerce, and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

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October 2, 2019

annoyance, compassion, disgust, empathy, feelings, hatred, hope
Practicing Toward Perfection
Failure brings us closer to perfection than waiting ever will.

Not all ideas are meant to be brought to life, but if we are waiting for the perfect idea to present itself, under the perfect circumstances, with the perfect timing, we will create nothing. We will bring nothing new into the world. Whatever inspiration we may have had will have been wasted on waiting.

The problem with perfect is that it is not something that manifests on its own. Perfect is the result of practice. Practice is the process of making an attempt, failing, making another attempt with better information, and then repeating that cycle over and over again until we improve or our product improves.

In order to have a really good idea that is executed with perfect timing under the perfect circumstances, we must first practice. We practice by executing not so good ideas or by executing good ideas poorly or with poor timing or under less than ideal circumstances. We then learn from those mistakes and try again, but with better information.

Eventually, if we are persistent enough, we may have a really good idea that we are able to bring to life with the right timing and under the right circumstances. Even this should be seen as practice, however. We never know what our best idea will be, so we must remain willing to fail, to admit our mistakes, and to do better next time.

Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

-Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body, Severna Park’s Holistic Chamber of Commerce, and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu
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October 1, 2019

courage, failure, perfection, practice, risk, vulnerability
Success is a Process of Becoming
Success is not what we accumulate, but who we become.

There is no mystical end point where we can say that we have arrived and that our work is done. If we are driven in any way, we will want to and we must continue to move forward. If there is no final destination where we can say that we have achieved all that we have set out to achieve, it is who we are throughout the process that matters most.

Success can be seen as either a process of accumulation or a process of self discovery. If it is a process of accumulation, whether of wealth, possessions, or accomplishments, we are reliant upon external markers for our fulfillment. We can chase them until the end of our days and, even if we acquire all of that which we seek to accumulate, we will never have enough. We will always be left wanting and needing more.

On the other hand, if success is seen as a process of self discovery, regardless of what happens to us externally, we can always find value in our experiences and the lessons therein. Success, after all, is a measure of value and worth. What is more valuable, what is worth more than experience, personal growth, and the enrichment of our lives and the lives we come into contact with?

Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

-Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body, Severna Park’s Holistic Chamber of Commerce, and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

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October 1, 2019

aspirations, becoming, goals, process, success
The Quiet Truth
Regret is knowing the truth and going in the opposite direction.

The truth is a whisper and, if it is to guide us, we must first be quiet enough to hear it. Once we hear the truth, we must then be brave enough to follow through on what it is telling us. This requires a degree of trust that is best described as faith.

It might start as a hunch or a suspicion that we should head in some new direction. It may feel like instinct, insight, or even curiosity. There may be no obvious logic or reason behind it. It is simply there, quietly nudging us nagging at us.

We do not have to believe in it. We cannot justify it or rationalize it. There is no explaining it. The question is only whether or not we are willing to allow ourselves to trust it and to experience whatever is on the other side of that trust, knowing that the only reward may be the knowledge that at least we tried.

Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

-Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body, Severna Park’s Holistic Chamber of Commerce, and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu
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September 30, 2019

courage, regret, truth
The Problem With Solving Problems
“The best businesses come from peoples’ bad personal experiences. If you just keep your eyes open, you’re going to find something that frustrates you and then you think, ‘Well, I can maybe do it better than it’s being done and there you have a business. if you can improve people‘s lives, you have a business.”

—Sir Richard Branson

A lot of good ideas come from dissatisfaction. We find that something bothers us enough that we want to take action. Soon, we discover that other people are unhappy about the same thing as us and our solution to that problem becomes a product or a service.

Dissatisfaction is not enough to keep an idea going, however. Once the original problem is solved, there has to be more to drive us forward than simply a reaction to a problem. At some point, if we are to have longevity with our idea, we must become proactive and creative about solving newer, better problems.

Innovation may start as a creative response to something we don’t like, but that is only good enough leverage to make a beginning. It won’t sustain us. We have to dig deeper in order to keep going. We each have a unique talent or skill, and that is what we must leverage if we want to make a difference that is long-lasting.

Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.

-Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Taikyoku Mind & Body, Severna Park’s Holistic Chamber of Commerce, and Kogen Dojo where he teaches Taikyoku Budo and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

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September 29, 2019

creativity, ideas, innovation, leverage, passion, problem solving, problems

From Annoyance to Hatred (There is Still Hope)

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Practicing Toward Perfection

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Success is a Process of Becoming

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The Quiet Truth

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The Problem With Solving Problems

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