Tag: parenting

• Divine Reliance

  Our children deserve
  to be taught something greater than
  to rely on us
  although we should be reliable
  they deserve to be taught
  to rely on a power
  greater than human power
  not even self reliance
  but reliance on
  that which is greater than self
  your self
  their self
  all selves
  it is that which preexists self
  and without which there is no self
  our task is to guide them
  toward that which we cannot give them
  and no one can take away from them
  the infinite love
  of the infinitely loving
  parent to all things

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  DIVINE RELIANCE
  By Robert Van Valkenburgh
  Meditations of a Gentle Warrior

  To read my longer writing, subscribe at robertvanvalkenburgh.com

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  September 16, 2024

  children, divine guidance, divine love, god, guidance, parental advice, parenting, spirituality

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• The Last Moment Like This

  When your children get on your nerves, before you react, pause, take a breath, and try to imagine it is the last time they will ever do so.

  When they talk too much or talk back to you…

  When they nag or hassle you…

  When they fight with you or with each other…

  When they ask for or demand too much…

  When they do not do what they are told or do the exact opposite of what you asked them to do…

  When they break, lose, or do not appreciate what they have…

  When they ask for your attention, support, or forgiveness…

  When they want a hug, a song, or just a few more minutes of your time…

  When they call you, visit you, or ask to spend the day with you…

  Before you react, pause, take a breath, and try to imagine it is the last time they will ever do so.

  Every moment is precious; they are fleeting and you will not get them back.

  Pause, take a breath, and try to imagine that this is the last moment like this, because it is.

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  June 26, 2023

  childhood, children, parenthood, parenting, relationships, time

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• Stewards Of Potential

  As parents, we are often torn between what we want for our children and what they actually need.

  We want what we think is best for them, but we can be blinded by love, concern, and fear.

  Our own hopes, desires, aspirations, and regrets get in the way of seeing what they truly need from us.

  Instead of seeing who they are, we see who we want them to be.

  But our children are so much more than simply who we raise and teach them to be.

  We can try to mold and shape them with the best of intentions, but they have a say.

  Their personalities and characters exist apart from, and even in spite, of what we want for them.

  It is our job to look past our own expectations, to see our children for who they truly are, and to help them to become the best version of that person.

  Our job as parents is to be good stewards of our children’s potential.

  This means understanding that their potential is not bound by our limitations.

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  June 24, 2023

  child raising, children, desires, fear, hope, needs, parenting, potential

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• Family Values

  Raise your children to value people over things.

  Teach them to pursue experiences not possessions.

  Show them that time is more valuable than money.

  Lead by example.

  They are watching.

  They are listening.

  They understand more than you know.

  Help them to learn from your mistakes so they do not make the same ones.

  Life is short and it only gets shorter.

  Make every moment matter.

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  May 24, 2023

  children, experiences, family, parenthood, parenting, people, priorities, relationships, values

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• Life’s Surprises

  Recently, my daughter was having a day that was not going the way she expected.

  She lost a library book, she forgot her school bag, the clothes she picked out did not match the weather, and life was simply not cooperating with her plans.

  As we drove to school, she was obviously distraught and I asked her what was wrong. “This day is just not going how I planned, daddy.” she said.

  This gave me pause because there will be many days in her life that will not go as she hopes or plans.

  “If life always goes according to your plans,” I replied, “your life is going to be very boring, dear.”

  “Why is that?” she asked.

  “Think of the things that change your plans like gifts to make your life more interesting. Sometimes these surprises will be disappointing and painful, but sometimes they will be more rewarding and wonderful than anything you could have possibly planned for yourself. Embrace life’s surprises, dear. They are for you, not against you. When things do not go as you planned, smile and ask, ‘What is this experience here to teach me?’”

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  April 20, 2023

  challenges, life, life lessons, obstacles, opportunities, parent, parenting, plans, surprises

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