Self-Centered Pain

We often underestimate just how painful self-centeredness can be. 

It seems like it will serve us. 

It feels like it will make us happy. 

Getting what we think we want all of the time should make us happy, after all. 

Quite often, however, this strategy backfires on us. 

In order for us to get what we want all of the time, it usually means that we must do so in spite of others. 

As a result, we behave poorly. 

We rub others the wrong way. 

We create circumstances in our lives that put us at odds with the people around us. 

The more we insist on having our way, the more we find ourselves frustrated by the fact that life does not play along with our plans. 

There are simply too many moving pieces and too many other needs, desires, and wills in the mix for things to go the way we want all of the time. 

We grow exhausted and discouraged. 

If the resistance we meet does not cause us to change our course, our discouragement turns into fear and anger. 

Eventually, we find ourselves more alone, more afraid of not getting our way, and more angry when we inevitably don’t. 

A life lived like this can hardly bring us satisfaction or contentment no matter how much of what we want we actually get. 

What we come to find, if we are willing to see it, is that getting our way all of the time, or even attempting to, does not actually give us what we truly want. 

The best things in life, we discover, are shared. 

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