There will be times when our goal is simply going to be survival.
Sometimes that is the best we can do.
And, that is enough.
It may not feel like enough, but, given the alternative, it is a good place to start.
Category: The Way of Life
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On Survival
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Power To Circumstances
There is actually very little reason to concern ourselves with that which is outside of our sphere of influence.
At best, doing so will cause us to worry.
Worry is an easy trap to fall into, after all.
There are an infinite number of possibilities for the future.
If we take the time and energy to consider all of them, we will surely go mad.
Worse than worry, however, is anger.
Both worry and anger have the power to destroy us from the inside out, but anger will do so quickly, violently, and with no remorse.
To give this power to circumstances over which we have no influence is not only self destructive, but it is a waste of our most valuable commodity, our time.
We will not get back the time that we give away.
Why would we give it away to that which we cannot change?
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Start With Smiling
We should start our day smiling.
We have been through a lot to get where we are.
Much has gone right and, undoubtedly, much has gone wrong.
But, here we are.
Every morning, we are given an opportunity.
We get to decide what we want to make of it.
We get to choose how we want to shape the time we have, what we want to create out of it, and what kind of change we want to make with it.
This is it.
Our life starts in this moment.
We might as well make the most of it.
Smiling is a pretty good place to start.
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Improving Through Our Struggles
None of us is immune from the struggles of life.
No one gets a pass.
Challenges, difficulties, and troubles are part of the deal.
We do not get to control how they come at us, when, or in what quantity.
Their timing is never convenient.
When it is our time to struggle, it is simply our time.
We do get to control how we respond to our struggles, however.
We get to choose how we will behave once their inevitability manifests as actuality.
When faced with adversity, we must decide who we want to be because of it or in spite of it.
We must decide how we want it to affect us.
We can either allow it to overcome us, to defeat us, and to change us for the worse, or we can rise to meet the challenge, adapt to our new circumstances, and become better people because of it.
Every obstacle is an opportunity for improvement if we allow it to be.
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Wasted Time
Giving our time and attention to those who will never know or care that we did is a fruitless endeavor.
With limited resources at our disposal, we must be careful how we allocate them.
What we give to one person or situation cannot be given to another.
Once given, it is gone, never to return.
It is best, then, to focus on those who matter most, those we care about most.
These are the people who need our time and attention.
It should not be wasted on those who do not know or care that we even exist.
Holistic Budo: As it is in budo, so too it is in life. As it is in life, so too it is in budo.
Robert Van Valkenburgh is co-founder of Kogen Dojo Self Defense Academy where he teaches Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
All photos by Robert Van Valkenburgh unless otherwise noted.*
*Robert Van Valkenburgh’s black and white photography can be seen at My Darkness To Light
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