Associations matter.
Energy is contagious.
Anger begets anger.
Selfishness begets selfishness.
Kindness begets kindness.
Generosity begets generosity.
You become the energy you associate with most.
Tag: selfishness
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For Others
You may do things for others that go unnoticed.
And even if the things you do for others are noticed, they may not be appreciated.
If being noticed or appreciated is your reason for doing these things, you are going to be disappointed.
You will be hurt or even angry when you do not get the reaction, recognition, or appreciation you were expecting.
The problem is not the response you get or do not get.
The problem, the cause of your disappointment, is your expectations.
If your motivation for doing things for others is that your actions will be noticed or that you will be appreciated, you are really not doing things for others.
You are doing them for yourself.
Therefore, you can choose either to do things for others without expectations or you can choose to be disappointed, but you cannot choose both.
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The Creative Paradox
Creativity is selfish.
You cannot do your best creative work trying to please others.
The muse is not cooperative.
It does not respond well to compromise.
Nor does it tend to show up for committees.
Your best creative work will start and end as something that pleases you.
And yet, creativity is also extremely generous.
The world needs your unique creative perspective.
The creative work you do brings more beauty into the world, beauty that would not exist were it not for your efforts.
Make art that pleases you and it will also bring pleasure to others.
If you attempt to make art that pleases others, however, you will likely please no one, least of all yourself.
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Resentments Or Relationships
Your resentments do not hurt only you.
They hurt the people who love you, the people who are close to you, and the people who rely on you.
When you are resentful, you are no longer emotionally available for those who need you.
To get angry when you are hurt, slighted, or taken advantage of is to be human, but to remain resentful once your anger subsides is a decision.
Resentment is selfish.
It blinds and deceives you.
It manipulates your thinking, steals your attention, and convinces you that nothing matters more than how you feel.
By holding onto your resentments, no matter how justified they may be, you are proclaiming that your feelings are more important than your life and the lives of those around you.
You can have resentments or you can have healthy relationships, but it is very difficult to have both.
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Anger Or Life
The problem with anger is that it feels good for a while and the more justified your anger is, the better it feels.
So you begin looking for new reasons to be angry, for corroboration from others, and for more justification to fuel your anger.
Eventually, anger consume you, blinding you to everything else and shrinking your world down to the size of itself.
By the time you realize your anger no longer serves you, that it stopped feeling good a long time ago, and that it brings you more pain than pleasure, you find that it is all you have left because anger is selfish; it takes everything.
You can keep your anger or your life, but not both.
Meditations on God 